For seven years, a Dateline producer follows 'The Devil and Bobbi Parker'

By Cathy Singer
Dateline NBC 

I first heard the name "Bobbi Parker" on April 5, 2005, the day after she was found on a chicken farm in east Texas. I was told by my boss to get down there right away and see what I could find out. It was a  most unusual story: The wife of a deputy warden at an Oklahoma prison was found with an escaped convict - a murderer no less - after being missing for more than ten and a half years. Bobbi and the convicted killer, Randolph Dial, had been located after a tipster saw the case on "America's Most Wanted" and called authorities. Bobbi's husband and two daughters had no idea what had happened to her. Was she dead?  Was she alive? Where could she possibly be? But right after she was found, she went back to her husband and children. Her husband had never remarried -  not even dated. Her daughters were now young women.

A few weeks after Bobbi and the convict had been located, my story about the case aired on Dateline. Questions swirled about: Had Bobbi been kidnapped and kept hostage all those years? Or had she helped Randolph Dial escape from prison and stayed with him willingly? Dial said publicly he'd kidnapped her. Bobbi wasn't talking. It became my goal to get Bobbi to sit down and talk to Dateline, but I could not even get her to talk to me on the phone. I sent her home-made chocolate chip Bundt cakes... but to no avail.

Then on the third anniversary of Bobbi being found, she was charged with assisting Dial escape from prison. Dial had died in prison the year before. Any chance of Bobbi talking to Dateline was now postponed till after the trial.

The trial took place three years later in 2011 during a broiling hot summer in a small - and thankfully air-conditioned - courthouse in rural southwestern Oklahoma. Jury selection went on for almost 7 weeks - in private - while the trial itself was almost three months long. It is considered the longest trial in state history -- and I was there virtually every day. Then one year ago today, September 21, the trial concluded -- with a guilty verdict. Bobbi Parker was now a convicted felon. She was immediately incarcerated and spent more than six months behind bars.

Bobbi wants to appeal her conviction, but in order to do that, she needs the trial transcript, estimated to cost $100,000 due to its length, which she cannot afford. She tried to be declared indigent by the court so that state would provide her with the transcript for free, but she was turned down. She feels she was not only wrongfully convicted, but now she is being denied her constitutional right to an appeal.  She is trying to get the U.S. Supreme Court to intervene. It will be reviewing the case on Monday, September 24. The Oklahoma judge also assessed Bobbi almost $67,000 for trial expenses. She is paying $100 a month. At that rate, it will take about 55 years to pay it off.

In the meanwhile, Bobbi sat down with Dateline - finally! - more than 7 years after I initially asked.  And now she is telling her story publicly for the first time ever... as she tries to set the record straight and clear her name.

On a hot summer day in 1994 convicted murderer Randolph Dial escapes from prison, taking the deputy warden's wife with him. But was she a kidnapped hostage or a willing accomplice? Dateline NBC's Edie Magnus reports.

 

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Thanks Cathy, I hope this will help Bobbi and her family.

  • 2 votes
Reply#1 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 2:15 PM EDT

Didn't believe her then, don't believe her now!

  • 1 vote
Reply#2 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:18 PM EDT

It is good that none of you have ever been in a situation like this but so sad that you believe you can judge this woman. When this happens to a child and they are found we rejoice, when it happens to an adult we falsely believe that there are other choices.... I say God Bless her for choosing to live and return to her family. I believe that she was kidnapped and that the Warden was truly at fault for ignoring the profile he was presented with. It is hard to believe that in this day and age the people of OK would allow a convicted murderer to do anything outside the walls of a prison. The warden should be locked up and have the key thrown away. This man refused by his own testimony to acknowledge the warnings about this prisoner and allowed him, against specific recommendations to not only walk around freely but put Bobbi and her family in direct peril by putting a studio in their garage. I would like to know what happened to the money that was collected for the sales of that art work......

One more thing The Warden admitted that he had received news of their whereabouts on TWQ separate occasions. By his own admission he took it upon himself to ALLOW this CONVICTED MURDERER to remain at large...... I see that as aiding this criminal to do as he pleased.....and who would be at fault if during that time he had killed again???

  • 2 votes
#2.1 - Tue Sep 25, 2012 1:23 PM EDT

It is good that none of you have ever been in a situation like this but so sad that you believe you can judge this woman. When this happens to a child and they are found we rejoice, when it happens to an adult we falsely believe that there are other choices.... I say God Bless her for choosing to live and return to her family. I believe that she was kidnapped and that the Warden was truly at fault for ignoring the profile he was presented with. It is hard to believe that in this day and age the people of OK would allow a convicted murderer to do anything outside the walls of a prison. The warden should be locked up and have the key thrown away. This man refused by his own testimony to acknowledge the warnings about this prisoner and allowed him, against specific recommendations to not only walk around freely but put Bobbi and her family in direct peril by putting a studio in their garage. I would like to know what happened to the money that was collected for the sales of that art work......

One more thing The Warden admitted that he had received news of their whereabouts on TWO separate occasions. By his own admission he took it upon himself to ALLOW this CONVICTED MURDERER to remain at large...... I see that as aiding this criminal to do as he pleased.....and who would be at fault if during that time he had killed again???

  • 2 votes
#2.2 - Tue Sep 25, 2012 1:28 PM EDT
Reply

I Think she is a very good liar.

    Reply#3 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:26 PM EDT

    I dont believe her neither

      Reply#4 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:33 PM EDT

      You don't believe her neither?!? Have you ever heard of "either"?!? I don't believe you know how to compose a very intelligent sentence, so the belief part is not really important!

      • 3 votes
      #4.1 - Sat Sep 22, 2012 8:39 AM EDT
      Reply

      I believe she went with him willingly and I belive she would still be with him if they had not been caught!!!

        Reply#5 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:43 PM EDT

        I dont believe her! Mothers are always trying to get back to their children even if it costs them their life. For her to be gone for ten years and NEVER once attempt to contact her daughters, leave to get back to them or anything.... suspect.

          Reply#6 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:43 PM EDT

          It appears that NBC Dateline never heard the term "trauma bond" or is aware of the phenomenon of the "Stockholm Syndrome." Maybe they remember Patty Hearst. She was a victim as was Bobbi. As for the incompetent warden, they ought to replay his sneering face when he tells the interviewer, "maybe its my fault." He is a forerunner to Charlie Sheen.....another "winner" This country does not understand pathology. Look at Bernie Madoff.....very successful....but still pathological

          • 6 votes
          Reply#7 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:54 PM EDT

          I completely agree with "trauma bond" if you have never experienced it, NO ONE could ever understand. But I hear you Bobbie and I believe you. The Warden should be accountable for his actions or lack there of, but thats a ignorant man for you. Shame on you and all who jump to conclusions. Trauma bond is real, I know. Let this women enjoy the rest of her years.

          • 2 votes
          #7.1 - Sat Sep 22, 2012 2:00 AM EDT
          Reply

          Bobby Parker is absolutely guilty. When being interviewed, she exhibits body language that is inconsistent with her responses. These are known as micro-gestures and are in involuntary, often times, immediate response. When asked if she had been living as a married couple, for example she said she was not, yet nods her head in agreement to the question. She is guilty.

          • 1 vote
          Reply#8 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:56 PM EDT

          Maybe that is because the man who was holding her captive for years and years passed her off as his wife told people she was his wife and made her tell people he was her wife she is trying to overcome years of training.

          • 3 votes
          #8.1 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:50 PM EDT

          "micro-gestures"? I think someone knows just enough about this science to be dangerous.

          You cannot go by a long-term hostage's body language because they have been trained to act the opposite of what they feel for so long.

          AND...to decide her guilt or innocence on this highly subjective science is irresponsible and ignorant.

          • 2 votes
          #8.2 - Sat Sep 22, 2012 10:10 AM EDT
          Reply

          ok

          • 2 votes
          Reply#9 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:59 PM EDT

          I believe Randolph got Bobbi to believe in him. Once he was out of the prison he took her hostage. I believe she was beaten and there would be signs in xrays, etc. I believe if she didn't do cards and be by his side he would beat her and go after her family. If he really does have connections to the mob it would keep her frightened and not want to help out as they would go after her and her family. People have seen her all beaten up, is that made up? if you were beaten for any little thing done wrong, family being threatened, needed permission to do anything. I would do the same thing she did.

          having an affair with an inmate is one thing but to go off with a murderer when she has children she loves is another. The husband has stated she asked permission to do everything. Of course she would have to sound believable on the phone, especially to police, fbi, etc

          • 4 votes
          Reply#10 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 10:59 PM EDT

          Thank you, Karasasha. I lived that experience and I knew the only way to survive was to make him believe that I was fully invested in the relationship with him. I did everything he told me to do, as perfectly as I could. I still got beaten and raped - daily. All the threats have a great power - and you may question them, but you do NOT dare act on your misgivings. Rape and beatings serve a very specific purpose - and they WORK. I went through this more than 30 years ago, and I still can have severe reactions to certain things. She did what she HAD to to survive and under the belief that her family would be hurt, whether it was true or not. She had no way of knowing. I watched her closely as she spoke and she WAS TELLING THE TRUTH. So that warden can just shove his smug self up you-know-where!!!!!!!!! He would say those things to take the heat off himself.

          • 4 votes
          #10.1 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:30 PM EDT
          Reply

          ok

            Reply#11 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:02 PM EDT

            Stockholm Syndrome. It was never mentioned. I can't believe it. Bobbi Parker was a victim of Stockholm Syndrome.

            • 2 votes
            Reply#12 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:06 PM EDT

            I think she is telling the truth! She stayed to protect her family! As a Mom no matter how much you miss your children if you believe that they could be harmed, you will do what ever to protect them!!! The fact that the head of the prison had tips as to where they could be and did nothing, he should go on trial!! He was being paid to do a job and he failed!! I hope that she is allowed to live her life now in peace!!

            • 5 votes
            Reply#13 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:07 PM EDT

            Honestly, why does it matter at this point? Her family believes her story and that is really all that matters. It really isn't about anyone else. And I don't think anyone can honestly say how they would react in a situation like that. No one will ever know everything that went on in this case. My big question is what about the warden? He clearly messed up big time here and yet he isn't the one in the "hot seat". I sure wouldn't want someone who blatantly ignores the protocols of a prison like he did still in charge!

            • 4 votes
            Reply#14 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:08 PM EDT
            Reply
            Comment author avatarNanci Lacyvia Facebook

            Unless you've walked a mile in her shoes, you can't judge her. I was taken by a couple when I was a kid and I was missing for over two years. There were times I could have told someone, but I had forgotten my real name. I feared for my life. My "father" slept with either a gun or knife under his pillow. That was threat enough. I didn't need to be threatened everyday to know the threat was there. What can I say, brainwashing is a bitch.

            • 5 votes
            Reply#15 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:09 PM EDT

            For me the difference is u were a kid, she is a grown woman. You couldn't remember ur name, you were a scared child. Sorry you had 2 go through that. Hope all is well with u now.

            • 2 votes
            #15.1 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:18 PM EDT

            I have known grown women that have stayed in abusive relationships for any one who has been beaten really truly beaten down you are completely helplesss you begain to believe what you are told to believe. Yes she was a grown women and after ten years she was conditioned maybe in the first few years she thought of ways to get away but if you are hit everytime you step out of line you learn to keep your head down and do as you are told.

            • 3 votes
            #15.2 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:26 PM EDT
            Comment author avatarNanci Lacyvia Facebook

            Well, for me lightening struck twice. I found myself in a seriously abusive relationship in my 20's. I was with him for almost two years. I found myself acting just like I did when I was a kid. I fell into that behavior as though it were just natural. It was how I survived before. I was scared of this man but I bought him a game system, expensive keyboard, gave him money, and even stopped him from trying to kill himself.

            When I left him, I had made several reports against this man, but detectives kept dropping the ball on me. They didn't believe me. Now I have a 20 year restraining order against him. It took this man coming to my house with a gun nine years after we broke up to get that order.

            • 5 votes
            #15.3 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:36 PM EDT

            Nanci you have an amazing story it is very hard to overcome learned behavior to break the chain and to move foward in you life most people don't understand that.

            • 3 votes
            #15.4 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:43 PM EDT
            Reply

            It is Called Stockholm Syndrome. The captive begins to sympathize with the captor. I can't believe no one mentioned it.

            • 2 votes
            Reply#16 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:10 PM EDT

            Her story seems too odd to be true. Never tried 2 escape especially while he was in the hospital. The guy slept, didn't he ?? It's not like she was bound and gagged. Don't believe her either.

              Reply#17 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:11 PM EDT
              Comment author avatarNanci Lacyvia Facebook

              I know it sounds odd. In hind sight, even victims would agree with you on that. But if you haven't been through it, you can't explain it.

              The people who took me had regular conversations with a police officer in a Micky D's. The officer would even buy me ice cream cones. So why wouldn't I believe them when they say things like we can get to you anywhere you go if you leave. Why would I go to the police if the police are friends with them? There is an explanation for her behavior. They're just hard to explain to people who have never lived through this extreme brainwashing.

              • 3 votes
              #17.1 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:24 PM EDT
              Reply

              Totally think she is innocent. Her captor never waivered that he had kidnapped her.When you are a victim of a violent rape and being held captive you do and say whatever you have to in order to to survive.I was a victim and held hostage and I said exactly what I thought he wanted to hear to stay alive even though it was 99% lies.As far as I'm concerned it was all the warden's fault and he had 2 chances to let the FBI know where they were but didn't.He knows it was all his fault that it happened and I feel like he didn't want them found.She should sue the correction system and the warden because ultimately that is who is to blame.If you haven't ever survived something like this you don't have a clue on what you will do to be a "Survivor".

              • 5 votes
              Reply#18 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:13 PM EDT

              Knowing Bobbi & her family I will NEVER believe she is guilty. This case has been mishandled and botched from the beginning. I will continue to pray for Bobbi & Randy, their girls and grandchildren. I pray that one day they will be released from the hold this has had on their lives all these years and that God will grant them healing and peace. Please join me in prayer for the Parker family!

              • 6 votes
              Reply#19 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:13 PM EDT

              I grew up with my mother who was ( and still is) in an abusive relationship for over 20 years the fear and sence of helplessness very much fits with an abused women. After so long the mental abuse and conditioning gives makes you feel helpless and makes you forget how to think and act on your own.

              • 4 votes
              Reply#20 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:16 PM EDT

              I believe her. Living in fear, harassment and treat must mess your mind up. I wouldn't be surprised that someone would prefer suffer personally than risk your family to be put in danger. To be safe, you need to play a game with a criminal like that: if you don't play, he'll play with you, so you don't have the choice. Yes, 10 years is long, and you probably get into a pattern. But was it her choice and was she happy? I don't think so.

              • 4 votes
              Reply#21 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:16 PM EDT

              I've watched this story for years, as it culminated in Bobbi's conviction. I believe her. She did the best and most loving thing she could do for her family - she protected them with her silence. She paid with her own pain for their freedom. It is a sad commentary on our society when victims, having been completely traumatized, become the accused. I hope she and her family will find complete healing and live peacefully. Bobbi, you get my vote of confidence. God bless you and your family. From a fellow Oklahoman.

              • 3 votes
              Reply#22 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:20 PM EDT

              Randolph Dial, the escaped convict, ADMITTED he kidnapped her!!!! Case closed. The prosecuter is unethical and also intellectually-challenged, meaning, dumb as a rock.

              Many men and some women have a hard time understanding how any human could be degraded to such a point that they have lost their humanity and their will. That is what happened in this case, she was terrorized, and with his controlling her every move, she became like a dependent infant. It is also called the Stockholm Syndrome.

              • 4 votes
              Reply#23 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:29 PM EDT
              Reply

              I only hope that Bobby and her family can now find peace and live without the ignorance of people that don't understand.

              • 3 votes
              Reply#24 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:36 PM EDT

              Wow...I hope none of you ever have to endure Bobbi's nightmare. Haven't you people ever heard of Stockholm's Syndrome? Why would a mother of such young children leave those children, presumably forever? Someone mentioned body language. Guess that person missed the fact that Bobbi had tears in her eyes the entire interview.

              Also, as a criminal attorney myself, I know that the guilty do not appeal their convictions after their jail time is complete. They appeal in hopes that someone screwed up in trial enough to get the conviction overturned so that they can get out of jail. Once out of jail, they no longer care and they most certainly do not appeal the matter so as to clear their names!

              That f@$&ing sorry excuse for a head warden should have been on trial. That idiot let a convicted murderer outside penitentiary walls. We have felons convicted of petty theft that get less freedom than that on work release around here. That sorry excuse for a warden gave Dial the freedom to do what he did. His arrogance in THINKING he is a good judge of character led him to totally disregard a psychiatrist's report that laid out EXACTLY what Dial was capable of. Now to save his reputation, he is tanking Bobbi's and victimizing her repeatedly. Then on top of it, he has the audacity to be arrogant about his utter ineptitude as a warden. What an ass.

              All Bobbi knew was what Dial allowed her to know. The only woman that truly knew her while she was living with Dial was her boss at the chicken farm and that woman knew she was a battered woman. By the way, battered woman are usual Stockholm Syndrome sufferers. It's the reason battered wives do not leave their husband. They have been trained like dogs to do what their "master" wants. Bobbi still behaved as a battered woman when she returned home. That is how deep the psychological trauma was/is. You can't judge Bobbi by what you THINK you would have done in her shoes because, luckily, we have never been in her shoes. We don't truly know how we would act...think...feel.

              Again, I hope that none of you have to endure her nightmare. But I sincerely hope some of you find wherever it was you lost your compassion and empathy.

              • 5 votes
              Reply#25 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:45 PM EDT

              That was very nicely worded and I completely agree.

              • 3 votes
              #25.1 - Fri Sep 21, 2012 11:56 PM EDT

              Wait till the everything from the trial comes out....Excellent post! You have said what we have all wanted to say for years!

              • 2 votes
              #25.2 - Sat Sep 22, 2012 2:31 AM EDT
              Reply
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